Tuesday, April 2, 2013

It's Not Me; It's All You (And It's certainly NOT a guru or a system or...)


I say this over and over when people say that something they've experienced at Girl on Fire has changed some aspect of their lives. They often say something (too) kind about me, and I stop them, "It's not me; it's you."

Finding a right fit teacher and space is important, for sure, but all kinds of trouble ensues if you start to think that anything happening to you -- good or bad -- has anything to do with that teacher.  And really? You should RUN FAST away from any teacher who DOES take the credit, any teacher who thinks they are some sort of freaking "guru."

Your practice is YOUR practice. Thinking it has anything to do with the teacher is a sign that you are not progressing, that there is some emotional immaturity, that you are driven by needs that have never been fulfilled, and that you are unwilling to take responsibility.

I am a guide. I walk my own path. I point at it and say "this worked for me." I encourage experimentation, using my own experience as a base, a starting point, but from there, you are on your own.

I can supply all kinds of awesome, interesting information. I can point out suggestions. I can share my own successes and (more often) my own failures.

But that's it.  The rest is up to you.

Students who stick around for any amount of time start to experience all kinds of changes in all areas of their lives, from physical to emotional to spiritual.

This happens. It has nothing to do with me or even with the type of work we do.

It has everything to do with the fact that you are doing the work, paying attention to yourself, taking the time to develop awareness.

This can happen through any process. Yoga is not magic. Dance is not magic. Running is not magic. Prayer is not magic. No modality is magic.

The Magics reside in the DOING, not in the thing.

Please read that again.  The Magics reside in the DOING, not in the thing.

(And most certainly not through some freaking "transmission," unless you BELIEVE it to be true and then, you see, it's in the DOING (your believing) not in the THING.)

I cannot emphasize this enough.

I got to see all of this really clearly last week in a few ways, but one of them was about shaking hips.

A student who has spent a lot of time in pain, a lot of time getting hurt in a wide variety of ways, from very simple movements in all the environments of her life...she had a major breakthrough.

She watched this video.  She watched it a couple of times.

And then here's the important part: she extrapolated what was pertinent to her and created her own way of using that information. And then? She PUT IT INTO PLAY.

I didn't know this was happening, and so after class, I said, "WOW! I have never seen you MOVE like that!" (It really was night-and-day amazing with glitter on top!)

She told me about the video and what she learned and she shared her new internal mantra.

And because she is able and ready and willing to take responsibility for her troubles, she was able and ready and willing to take responsibility for her solutions.

Voila!  It's not me; it's all you.