Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Alas, Life is NOT a Star Trek Episode ((sigh))

Begonias, always in memory of my Great Aunt Ardelle

If you know me at all, you have noticed that I kinda ((cough)) like Star Trek.

ALL the Star Trek, ALL the time.

When I am stressed, all I have to do is stream an episode and the sounds alone actually soothe my beast-y  brain.

I am like Pavlov's dog but for the transporter sound and even that muffled sound of ship life and the way the doors slowly suction seal and... ((Here))

But it's not just this Pavlov response thing that has me visiting my friends the characters almost every day for at least a few minutes or how long it takes me to eat some lunch.

It's the whole idea(l) of it.

Here is this human made construct -- the Federation -- and it has attained, within the context of a technologically and scientifically driven culture, a religious life sort of perfection. Like what St. Benedict could only hope for when he wrote the Rule to guide people's interactions with the larger community.

My Aspie brain experiences a sort of nirvana hopefulness when it engages with the world of Star Trek.

Look at all the people following the rules and therefore experiencing a deep happiness while also staying completely focused on each of their own special interests!

The Federation's rules are grounded, of course, within a Gandhi like morality, so that speaks to my Jesus loving, feed ALL the people, don't hurt anyone heart.

Even as I write this I am sighing from the thought of this kind of peace and structure.

But here I am, living not on a Starfleet ship or space station ((another sigh)).

I live in the "real" world of messy humanity.

((Wide eyed and confused Aspie face inserted here))

Daily I try to negotiate the world around me by constructing rules based on people's behaviors so that I can figure out what is the "right way."

Here's the catch (which if you are not an Aspie, you know what's coming): people's behaviors CHANGE from one minute to the next!!

And this rule that I made up for this scenario? Well, if the next scenario is even a mirco-whatever different, I will not make the necessary association with the previous scenario; I will not extrapolate. Rather, I will have to learn all over again.

Every time.

((Runs back to watch some more Star Trek where everyone is always the same))

I make fun of myself here, but I am headed to an important point that I do not think is just about my Aspie nature.

As things are changing in my life and we are making new arrangements and negotiating new ways, it would be easy for me to kinda...collapse in the grey of it all.

But I have not.

I AM learning.

I am learning that the main way real life is not like Star Trek is that things are not so easy to categorize as "right" and "wrong" and "good" and "bad" or whatever set of words you want to insert here.

We are all so very different.

We all have such very different needs.

Freedom and love and happiness and health are different from each person to the next.

But all the main social constructs -- like family, relationship, community, work -- they are all built from about one or two blueprints.

This is not good enough as evidenced by the rates of divorce and depression and overall unhappiness in this world right now.

We need more blueprints.

Meaning, we each need to make our own damn blueprints and we need to revisit the blueprint constantly.

Priest and nuns say that their reasons for joining this or that order are always different from their reason for staying and that you have to decide every day to commit, to be devoted, that it's not this one time decision.


We could learn a lot from that act of daily discernment.

This doesn't mean we have to daily overhaul our lives; it just means that daily we recommit and dive back in -- consciously.

You can now learn how to teach dance as a spiritual practice! My first teacher training is coming at the end of September! Just visit the "Teacher Training" tab at the top of this page.

If you want to explore more deeply how to create an at-home dance sadhana (spiritual path) practice, you could join my super secret Facebook group, Inferno of Awesome. This group is invisible until you're added. FIRST, make sure you are my friend on FB, and SECOND, ask me to add you.